Rabbit Trails and Spiderwebs

  On Divorce   This is not a complete work, but a few observations.   It is not all personal, but it is all true.   It is about the parts that move, and the ones that don’t.   The issue, at its core, is that of failure.   Failure to listen, failure to tell.   Failure to hear what is not said, and to do things that drive you to the edge of hope or fear.   The church doesn’t know what to do with it.   Society doesn’t know what to do with it.   Those that are adamant about how correct they are, are the most afraid of it happening to them.   Our friends are unclear about what to do with it when it happens.   Most of the time it is only a trail of loss and the crumbs of our past strewn along as we go.   The rending of the fabric of our relationships and lives is a sound you cannot not remember.   You can imagine the lamb that has it's tail docked and has to re-orient its life and adapt to the new reality.   N...

Cohesion  The mess was mine.  The mess was close.  The mess came in an instant.  In an unexpected way the water broke all around me, I could not make it stop.  It ran until it was done of its own accord.  Like the sobs of a wounded soul, there was no stopping until the exhaustion was pervasive.  The work of keeping it all together and contained was captured in the spring, and had been released.  The work had been hidden from the unsuspecting, the uninterested and, myself as well.  I had not taken the account of the labor needed to hold it all in place.  To keep the plates spinning and balls juggling and the tension “just so”.   Seemingly innocent was the question.  Seemingly simple was the reply.  It was the gaze that was different.  It was the intensity that made the difference.  The eyes that did not simply accept the pat answers and glib explanations.  It was the power of those eyes that d...

Naming your dragons (Written about when I decided to take control of my life back)  The conversation was rather simple really. It started with a few light comments, we were strangers actually, but the question was direct and pointed.   The questions came in sequence and progressed from simple to the more complex. “I have never seen a pet like that.”   Even though it was on a leash, you can understand the curiosity as the pet was a dragon.   It was quite small, but still, it was a dragon.   Pointy tail, scales small but powerful wings, pointy things on its head and green/yellow eyes.   While it is not your normal leashed pet, there it was.   “Does it have a name?” was next.   That is when things took a turn. “The name is Insecurity”, I said.   “It is actually one of a litter, but I had left the remainder at home.”   The look was curious, and the questions came with a new tone, inquisitive but more guarded thi...